Some gay men think bathhouses are an amazing invention. Others see it as a degrading sex-filled establishment. Either way, going for the first time can be a scary experience – and this guy lived to tell the tale.

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Muscular man in sauna
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It all started when this military guy on Reddit felt lonely, and decided to go to gay bathhouse for the first time. Spoiler: he ended up feeling worse.

“I sat in my car for about 40 min”, he begins his story, “nervously sweating and thinking ‘I’m gonna get recognized, or someone will hurt me!'”

Eventually he found his courage – and sprinted to the door.

“At the door, there was an employee; I told him it was my first time. He said ” You do KNOW what kind of place this is? Right?” I told him yes and felt so ashamed. He buzzed me in.

“Once inside, the entry room was a locker room. I stripped down and locked my stuff away.
It was strange; it was like a big maze with some reflective material. It was also badly lit, in fact, most of the light was coming from TV Monitors playing gay porn.

The men there were very average looking. (FYI I don’t consider myself good looking, so I felt like I fit in). I would say it was about (50% guys in their 50’s, 30% guys in their 30’s and 40’s, and 20% in their 20’s).

Surprisingly, I didn’t feel any judgement and most guys were polite. One older guy did corner me in the maze and said: “You’re exactly my type”, and grabbed my waist. I told him “thanks, but I’m not interested.”

He then left, it still felt kinda weird.

One room, had two guys on a bed fucking and a lot of guys were just watching and jacking off to it.

Some cute couple was making out in a pool and there was a steam-room, sauna, and showers! There were computers, where I’m guessing a bi guy was watching straight porn?

Eventually, I saw a cute guy and followed him, but I was too slow, and some other guy grabbed and started fucking him.

I was like “Whoa, umm maybe this place is too much for me to handle.”

I left after an hour or so, some guy did try and suck me off, but I wasn’t feeling it. The entire time I just felt so apathetic.

Honestly, I felt even lonelier after the whole thing, but I’m glad I did it. I have nothing against bathhouses and recommend trying one just for the experience or to learn something about yourself.

I saw men there really enjoying themselves (no pun intended), so definitely the experience varies person to person.

But, just don’t indulge in something thinking it will fix a problem. I feel less internalized homophobia, and I feel less afraid of talking to other single gay men now! I’m just feeling better about myself!!!”