Top, bottom, versatile – the important thing when you’re having sex is doing what you (and your partner) love. Some people really do like both, but when this top gay man on Reddit tried to explain why he loves topping so much – he did it perfectly.

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“For me”, he writes, “topping isn’t about the orgasm or my dick primarily.” Instead, he lists three major things:

The athletic aspect. Once I get into a rhythm, it’s a runner’s high. Combined with the sex, it’s like when you meditate or when you dance. There’s nothing but the rhythm and instinct.

The pleasure-giving aspect. Putting a guy who really likes getting fucked into that howling grunting totally losing his shit state is hella fun to do and hella fun to watch.

The psychological aspect. I’m inside him. Literally. My cock is inside his body. I’m owning that ass. It’s mine. I’m violating him. Gonna shoot my jizz right inside him right where it belongs. Fuck. Words fail for this one probably… you’ve either felt that and know what I mean or you haven’t.

Other commenters, both tops and bottom, were quick to agree, with some adding their own two cents:

The other awesome part that you didn’t mention is that feeling of complete vulnerability when you’re cumming inside someone.

On one hand like you said… you’re violating, owning, him. Planting your seed in him (or her).

But on the other hand… that moment when you lose control of your body while you’re literally INSIDE someone else can make you feel really vulnerable… in a good way.

What is it for you?