Escorts have a lot of stigmas associated with them, a lot of misconceptions – and of course, a lot of worrying truths. But sometimes, it’s not just about the sex (at least for the client) – sometimes it’s a way to fight loneliness.

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And sometimes, you get a lot more than what you thought you were going to get.

Two gay men couple
Illustrative Photo

That’s what happened to this guy on Reddit, who hired a male escort for the first time while on a business trip. He felt lonely, and didn’t want to go through the trouble of using a dating app – so he went for the “easy” way.

“I asked him a lot of questions”, he makes clear upfront, “specifically to be sure that he does this work willingly and was not being coerced, pressured, or in any other way doing the work non-consensually. I felt comfortable with his answers.”

And then the story begins:

I’ve been travelling and I started to feel a bit of a longing for some companionship. I have friends-with-benefits back home, but none in other countries.

I met a few guys from apps during the trip, but honestly, by this time I was worn out from work and finding someone on an app was more effort than I really felt like spending. Plus, it really wasn’t just sex I wanted.

What I expected from an escort was that he’d show up, we’d get off, he’d leave, and then I’d still feel lonely. I thought escorts really just were a euphemism for prostitutes. What I wanted was to, for just one night, feel like I had someone in my life in that moment.

In the country I was visiting, escorting/hiring an escort is legal (even without the silly pretext that the payment is for time spent together and not about the sex.)

I reached out to Ryan, a twinky escort in his 20’s. We agreed on spending a couple hours together and the financial arrangements associated with this.

I’ve never slept with someone I didn’t take the time to get to know. Even hook-ups/fwb, it’s usually been after getting to know each other a bit. So, I asked Ryan what sort of food he liked and arranged to meet the next day just before dinner.

Since the primary focus was on having some companionship, I honestly didn’t care that much if dinner took up all our time.

We went out to eat at a really nice restaurant and I really enjoyed just talking with him. It really felt a lot like a first date, in a way. It made me feel a lot less lonely, and he was very open about his life, but leaving out the key details that would prevent a weirdo from stalking him.

When the meal was finally over, we went up to my room. We spent a lot of the time talking, and cuddling. It felt so nice to have his body up against mine, and for the first time in awhile, not to feel so lonely. There was a lot of sensual-but-not-sexual touching during that too.

To be honest, I was enjoying this part so much, I didn’t really care if it got sexual and when it finally did, it was he who made the move.

In his escort profile, he mentioned what his type was. I fit the bill pretty spot on, so when he turned things sexual and said it was because he wanted me pretty bad, there seemed to be some amount of truth to it.

We lightly fooled around, mostly hands. He went down on my a bit. Ryan was by far the most orally talented guy I’ve ever experienced, and not too bad with his hands. I literally did not know oral sex could possibly feel that good.

We never got to actual sex since neither of us were in the mood to bottom. You could say “But hey, you like to fuck twinks and you paid him, shouldn’t you get to fuck him?” It’s not like that though.

I found myself legitimately caring whether or not he had a good time and whether or not what I did made him feel good. This is what’s counter-intuitive about the whole thing.

Aside from the business arrangement of it, it really did feel like someone I went on a date with. I’m sure if I had pushed about it, he might have let me, but that would have ruined the experience that I felt like we were both having.

He stayed a bit longer than I had actually paid for, and he never once checked his phone or the clock. When he left, the bed felt empty without him, and my only regret was that I needed to go back to my own life and he had to go back to his.

I thought I might feel sleazy or regretful for paying for an escort, I felt like I’d feel as I had been branded with a scarlet letter as someone who had paid a sex worker, but in all honesty, it was a very different experience than I expected, and I’m glad I took the opportunity.

It was nice not to feel alone for just one night.