Despite all the advances being made, some gay men still feel the need to stay in the closet – even with their close friend. But when this guy on Reddit accidentally sent his straight best friend a nude photo of a man… things went out of control, in a bad way. The good news? He got a boyfriend out of it.
“I’m 23 and still closeted”, the man writes. “I sent a quick email to my best friend of 3 years with an image as an attachment.”
But he was in a hurry… and instead of sending a graphic he saved from Reddit, he accidentally sent the next photo save on his computer – a picture of a naked man. And the text attached to it?
“Something from Reddit I think you’ll enjoy!”
That’s when things started spiralling down.
“I just got an email from him and I quote, ‘WTF dude? Why are you sending me a pic of a naked man as something you’d think I’d like???’
I haven’t come out to anyone, yet, and I don’t know how he’ll take it. I want to tell him it was a joke but I don’t think he’d like that. I can’t even think right now. What have I done?”
Later, the man added another update.
After I ran out of work I called my friend, and told him I needed to talk to him. After reading replies to my post I said fuck it, it’s time to be myself. I was worried since basically our friendship was built on my lies and pretending to be straight.
My friend told me he deleted my email since he didn’t want his fiance seeing it. He asked me what I wanted to talk about. I told him I just needed to talk to him about the email. He was quiet on the other end. Then he said – ‘You’re not gay are you?‘.
I didn’t know what to do. I didn’t respond. After several seconds he hung up.
I sent him an email saying I need to talk to him and just tried to call him and he didn’t answer. I was going to tell him it was a joke but you know what, I’m truly tired of lying. I feel a little relief but at the same time I have a sick feeling in the pit of my stomach that I may have lost my friend.
I have a secret friend-with-benefits coming over in a little while and he’s going to spend the night. I need a little release and I don’t want to spend the night alone.
And then… another update, after the friend-with-benefits spent the night. And the day.
I’ve been seeing this man for several months and he’s been really patient with me knowing I was closeted.
Anyhow, during his stay I decided to finally ask him if he would be my boyfriend as it was time for me to stop hiding.
He said yes! We were both ecstatic. I also asked him if he would move in with me – I own a house and he rents a nice apartment but lives 15 miles away very close to his job. I’m thrilled that I don’t have to hide my relationship with him anymore.
And what of the disappearing best friend? Well, he finally showed up.
This morning at 8 am my doorbell rang. It was him. I asked my boyfriend to wait in the bedroom for the time being.
My friend came in and sat down and just asked me if I was gay, yes or no. I said yes. He started on about how I’d lied to him all this time and that he didn’t know who I was and that he couldn’t trust me.
Then it turned nasty. He started saying that I was trying to get with him and that I’m some pervert for showering with him at the gym. I felt really shitty because I knew I’d deceived him for 3 years but I hoped he might understand why.
Then he made his way to the door and he was angry. He started on again about my watching him shower and did I get a thrill from that and did I want to fuck him? I told him no.
I went to the door to open it because I’d had enough and just wanted him to leave. As I got near him he pushed me backward. Before I knew it my boyfriend was between us!
He said for my friend not to fucking touch me. My ex best friend said who the fuck is this? I said he was my boyfriend and my ex friend just turned around and left.
Well, I have other friends. Not as close as he was. In a way I do understand that I lied to him all this time. I wanted the best of both worlds – being straight publicly but being gay privately and it had to end sooner or later.
The next step will be my family, friends, and coworkers. Friends and coworkers I’m not worried about. My family won’t be thrilled. But, I’ll find a way to deal with it. My new boyfriend and I will find a way to deal with it. 🙂